Just when I thought I was going to have to resign myself to rewatching Happy Endings all summer, salvation came via HBO Max: The full trailer for the long-awaited Gossip Girl reboot just dropped, and it is spicy. Let’s dive into this thing, shall we?
- Okay, I’m happy to see this thing is more than two minutes long (no offense, one-minute Sex and the City reboot teaser, but give me a longer run time or give me death!)
- Immediate shot of protest signs reading “Fair Contract Now,” because...Gen Z?
- I’m seeing a lot of Grammys stacked up in someone’s home. God, please let this be a version of events where Rufus Humphrey went multiplatinum and had a late-in-life baby who is now a bad, rebellious teen.
- “We’re a group of friends who’ve known each other since we were babies,” narrates the mysterious Julien Calloway as attractive young people try on sparkly gowns in closets bigger than my entire apartment.
- OMG, three-way kiss!
- OMG, pink buzz cut!
- I promised myself I wouldn’t bring up my experience briefly attending the school that Gossip Girl was based on, but...nobody hung out on the Met steps.
- Love the Frank Ocean song playing in the background as this mean clique takes on a new recruit.
- I am 90% positive that this show will enthrall me with its pilot and then keep me on the hook solely to find out what happens with all the new, queer characters.
- So many shots of bridges, as though these kids travel between boroughs (or take the subway).
- Hi, Kristen Bell’s voice!
- Of course the eponymous Gossip Girl is now an IG account. Of course. Honestly, whatever it was before (a Blogspot?) never really made sense to me.
- Hello, Tavi Gevinson!
- One teen describes themself as “influential,” which...ew.
- Some guy, who looks late millennial, is wearing a porkpie hat, and I hate it.
- The word privilege was used less than two minutes in. Everybody drink!
- How am I supposed to make it until July 8?
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June 10, 2021 at 09:11PM
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